Ever since I was a kid, pessimism has played a huge role in my life. Maybe it was because I would expect the worse to happen to that when the outcome is marginally better than expected, I feel better about myself. However, when there's that bit of negativity in your life every day of the week, it becomes poisonous; You become pessimistic and negative about how people would perceive you. And that's never good for you.
Being pessimistic immediately caused me to shrink from society and become this person with low self-esteem. And I've been suppressing all of my sadness and thoughts inside.
I hate when I feel bad about myself.